My littlest guy, Silas, will be two in a couple of months. We’ve been dealing with a lingering cold and teething, which has led to some epic tantrums over the past week. His socks are too loose. He wants his hood up – no, no, wait! He wants it down. He wants to play with the dirty glasses in the kitchen sink, and I won’t let him. The list is endless. And at least twice a day, it turns into 30-45 minutes of hysterical screaming no matter what you do. Needless to say it’s been a bit much to handle, but oddly it hasn’t been driving me as crazy as I’d think it would. My secret? The past few days I’ve been in a lot of contact with the women in my life who support me. It seriously keeps me sane.
And really, it’s these little points of contact, the daily interactions, that I want to focus on with this blog. Hence the name: Everyday Sisterhood. It’s not meant to be fancy or glamorous or difficult to accomplish. It’s supposed to offer accessible ideas on how to connect, even if it’s in your pajamas.
So I thought I’d do a quick rundown of the ways I’ve enjoyed sisterhood in just the past few days. A lot of these are little, but it’s how they add up that really counts.
- Sisterhood Circle: Monday night I attended a sisterhood circle offered by Angie Kusek at Ginger Birch. (You can also check out her Facebook page, Friends of Sacred Door & Ginger Birch.) I’m not going to go into a ton of detail because sisterhood circles deserve their own blog (possibly a guest blog by Angie if I can wrangle her into it), but basically it’s a monthly, all-female get together with a different topic at each meeting.
- Postpartum Food: When I went to sisterhood circle, I brought a couple of meals – curried lentil soup and lentil shepherd’s pie – for Angie, who just had a baby last month. Luckily she’s vegetarian, so it was easy to make extras for her as I made meals for my vegetarian hubby.
- Mentoring: I’ve been helping out a local woman who is in the early stages of getting her doula certification. Basically I’ve just made myself available to answer questions, etc. Monday night she had a question about my doula bag, so I let her know what I bring with me to births when I’m working as a birth doula. Side note: I was asked to assist at a birth doula training in a couple of weeks, so I’ll get the chance to connect with some more doula sisters as they start their journeys supporting new moms. So exciting!
- Playdate with a Purpose: Yesterday morning was a voting day in Wisconsin, so I went to my friends’ house while Jonah was at preschool. I’d forgotten that they were both home, so I originally proposed a play date with the intent that we could take turns watching kiddos while the other voted. They didn’t need the babysitting coverage because they were both off work, but they graciously offered to watch Silas while I ran over to my polling place and voted completely kid-free. We also got to hang out, drink coffee, and talk politics. Bliss.
- Wardrobe Advice: My son’s preschool hosted a snowball dance last night. (Cutest thing ever!) But I was a little confused by the instructions as to whether or not parents were supposed to dress up. It was nice being able to consult with another mom to see what she was planning on wearing.
Pregnancy Questions: Last night while we were getting ready for the dance, a good friend who’s expecting a baby next summer called to ask a quick pregnancy question. We chatted things over and I offered what information I had that pertained to her situation. She also followed up with me today so I’d know she was doing all right.
- Playdate for Fun: This morning the boys and I had grocery shopping to do, but a friend of ours and her little girl were hanging out at home, so we stopped by for an hour or so on our way to the store. Her daughter did such a great job sharing her toys! My sons, however, did a slightly less great job being gracious guests. But it was nice catching up, and she put out oatmeal bars for us to snack on. Jonah, my picky eating three-year-old, loved them, so we also left with a new recipe!
- Recipe Shares: Recipe sharing came full circle in the afternoon. I got a text from Angie about the curried lentil soup I’d sent her, so I sent that recipe her way.
- Celebrations: A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about a press conference I spoke at in favor of keeping water utilities in Wisconsin public (see Fear: Public Speaking). The state Senate was supposed to vote on the bill yesterday, but due to increasing public resistance to the bill, which would have made privatization of water easier, they scrapped it. Woot woot! Considering that two weeks ago they easily had the votes to pass this bill, this was a huge success! And my friends and sisters on Facebook were awesome about celebrating it and thanking me for the time I spent raising awareness.
This is not an exhaustive list of ways to engage in sisterhood, but it’s an example of some easy ways that you can work sisterhood into your everyday routine. And I can honestly say that these little points of contact and connection ground me and help me keep perspective, even when things aren’t perfect. Sisterhood doesn’t need to be elaborate or sparkly or Pinterest worthy. You don’t need to dress up for it (although that’s definitely fun sometimes, too) or clean your house for it. You certainly don’t need to pretend to be somebody you’re not for it. The only rule is that you have to show up and be available for connection. That’s it: Show Up and Connect.
What little things do you do to connect with your sisters?